What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

Knock knock! Yes?

What did one Rhino say to the other? My, I'm sure glad we found this decadent watering-hole.

why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

That's unfortunate.

Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

marble

Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

Roses are Red, violets are blue, I have STD, Now so do you. :3

Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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