Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

Johnny just finished his pie.

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, and an Atheist are eating at the same table. They are friends, and they do this from time to time.

Why was it so easy for Superman to pick up chics? His butt ox.

What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

A basket full of puppies can do anything, except put out a fire.

Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

1+1= 69

Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

How do you confuse a blonde? £74.56.5 x 4^4^4^5 (7) : [15(68yf4+s)]

A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...