A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

What happens when a Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. He gets a broken nose.

went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

The Juice where prosecuted by many time.

How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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