Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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