what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

there are three girls one said daddy why is my name rose because a rose fell on her head when yur a baby. daddy why is my name feather because a feather fell on your head when your a baby mumamhama, SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!

Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

An IRS agent named Harold Crick finds that he has the ability to hear a narrator comment on every moment of his life. He later becomes institutionalized in the Schizophrenic ward.

Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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