What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

So a man walks into a bar, right?

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

a. why? b. because I wanted

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

What city likes baseball the most? New York

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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