What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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roses are red poo is poo

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Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

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What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

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The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

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I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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