Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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A penguin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What colour are blackberries? Purple.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? To get to Your House. Knock Knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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What happens when a Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. He gets a broken nose.

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Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

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What did Tarzan say when he saw a herd of Elephants coming over the hill? Oh look, a herd of Elephants coming over the hill.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

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Maths.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops