If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

thumb_up thumb_down -23

yo mama's so dumb, she had to retake the 11th grade.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped six's mother

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your mother is so ugly that nobody wants to date her because she is hideous.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you stop a black man from drowning Get your foot off of his head

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops