Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Where did suzie go for her Birthday? A van

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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what's funny about war? nothing!

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

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Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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