what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

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what did the whale say when he came out of the water? BLAHHRRAHAHHAAARRRAER

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Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

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What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

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A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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