How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

N-E Pats never cheated

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

thumb_up thumb_down -27

girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

thumb_up thumb_down -27

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops