How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

Why did the city disappear? Someone nuked it

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

you will like this because i am black.

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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