Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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womens rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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