Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

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someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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What do u call a gay dinosaur Tyran a sore arse

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Hey, you must be a parking ticket. Because you are on the windshield of my car.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Little Anny fell on a sidewalk. Why isn't she crying? 'Cause I've thrown her out off the tenth floor.

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Women's rights

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Whats The difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull? One's a dog ones a human. 363\

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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