Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

What happens when there is a jew next to you and you are standing on a train track? A train hits you both and you both die.

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

Your face is hilarious.

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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