Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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Do you play piano? No

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Q. Why did the teacher trip and fall? A. Because his left foot was gnawed off by a camel, and he often finds it difficult to walk.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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a man was shot.... he died

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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