- Anti Joke

What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

A fish swims into a bar The town is flooded and thousands are dead

God is real.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

Who is the fattest mexican on the earth? Not Osama because he's dead...and he wasn't mexican..

Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

25

What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

Q: How do you keep a carnival fish for more than a week? A: Place it in formaldehyde when you get home

Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: BANG!

A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

the chicken crossed the road. the chicken was then caught by animal control because it was in the middle of a city.

there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

Q. What did the Vampire say when he ate the Pizza? A. Nothing. It is literally impossible for a vampire to be real, therefore it's insane if you thought it said something.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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