Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

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Why did Michael Phelps drown? He didn't because he is the best swimmer in olympic history.

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both fruit. Except the elephant.

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Yo Momma is not fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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