So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

a man was shot.... he died

A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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