What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

96

Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

Whats the leading cause of death Life.

How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Getting your balls chopped off by a maniac on LSD.

what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

What's better than a gold brick? 2 gold bricks.

I hear Lebron has a new phone. He has it on silent all the time. It's because he doesn't want to disturb anyone around him while they prepare for important games in which he will be an indispensable part of, especially during the 4th quarters of the NBA Finals.

Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

What did the black man say to the jew and the blonde girl as they walked to the car. Shotgun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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