A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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poopy is poopy

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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Have you heard the joke about the cat? No Are you kitten me

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

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whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

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Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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What did the Jew say to the Catholic? Nothing. He is a mute you insensitive moron!

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What do you call a guy named Bob hanging by a string? Plum Bob

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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