did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

Women's rights

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

whats the fastest way to be murdered tell your wife your cheating on her

why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

How was Charles Manson able to get women to kill for him? Because he was charismatic and intelligent.

Why did the little boy cry? Because his parents were shot in the face while he was forced to watch you insensitive jerk Now walk away ????

Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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