I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

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What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

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A man is walking in a bar and then leaves once he gets his drink

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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why did the kid die? his mom shot him

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What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

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There once was a man called steve, His name was steve

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a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practise.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

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what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

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the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops