how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

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Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

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Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

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what do you get when you cross ruddell with a chicken? still a prick

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A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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Knock knock Who's there? Amy winehouse Amy winehouse who? Amy winehouse died by falling down a flight of stairs.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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Once upon a time, people died. It was happening all over the land. They didn't LIVE happily ever after... since they died. The end... for them.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? One is a cat, the other is a banana.

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Why did Jimmy miss a question on his test? He put D

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L's I's that took Viagra.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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Why did the man think he was hungry? Answer: Because his brain told that he needed to Eat or he was going to be really hungry. Made by eli

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Why is the blonde so upset? Her mother is dying from cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Why did a black person get gingivitis? He repeatedly didn't brush which caused both dental plaque and tartar getting filled with harmful bacteria, and if they aren't removed from teeth, they will begin to irritate the gums and cause gingivitis.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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A woman went outside for some fresh air.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops