Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

Seriosly. too much sex again?

What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? No I said Lou. Oh hey Lou come on in.

Mom, how do you make babies? When a daddy and mommy love each other very much... They play with trains and tunnels!(Yay!)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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