What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

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Whats 1+1? window!

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

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What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

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Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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What's red and sweet and good to eat? A riddle that rhymes.

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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