To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

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Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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You having friends.

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Q: What do you call a dear with no eyes A: Nothing - call an animal cruelty service

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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Manchester City

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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