Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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what do u call a black men standing on top of a church. holy shit

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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why did joe diragi cross the road there was food on the other side

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What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

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what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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