Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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whats up with that? i'm from jersy

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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69

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Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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