What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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