Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

Q: Whats worse than running out of hot water? A: having wyatt friedman poop on your chest, Hit him up on FB

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Prior to this incident he was being chased by a psychopathec killer who had just murdered his family. As he was escaping on his bike, the murder's lookout who was holding a shotgun, swung the butt end of the gun, causing severe brain damage and eventually death to the escaping boy, also causing him to topple over on his bycicle.

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

Three men walked into a bar the other one ducked. SI

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

how did the bus fall outa the tree it got hit by a hellicopter how did the boy fall outa the tree he was attached to the bus how did the chicken fall outa the tree it fell off the branch

What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? I DON'T have a Corvette in my garage.

Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

What do you call a 2 storied house ?

did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

Why did the girl throw her watch out of the window? because her mind wasn't as intelligent as a normals person mind as she had mental problems.

a man walked into a bar today he suffers from depression from his wife leaving him and taking custody of the children on the grounds that he is an alcoholic and is unfit to raise children

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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