A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

how much fish could a chicken

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and their friend Satan asked if they heard about Jesus, and they said No.

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

Roses are flowers.

What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

Grace Ackerson

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

How was Charles Manson able to get women to kill for him? Because he was charismatic and intelligent.

A blonde is locked in a super-market. She dies.

A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

Knock knock Who's there The police The police who? Ma'am your son is dead

Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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