Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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Ebola

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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my penis

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

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the sky is green no it is not

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Corn Muffins

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops