How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

Kerry Katona becomes independent.

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

pobody's nerfect

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes?

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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