What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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Maths.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Beacuse she has no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's There? Not Sally.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

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What colour are blackberries? Purple.

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WILLY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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