A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

A bear comes across some people on a camping trip. But he then promptly leaves, because bears aren't inherently aggressive unless caring for their young or if they are provoked.

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

Roses are red, violets are blue, grass is green, sky is blue, dirt is brown, fire is orange, water is transparent, powder is white

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. You're adopted.

Q. What do mummies do when they run out of toilet paper? A. Nothing - they're dead and inanimate.

A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

lets work together to make all racists jokes in negitives

james hedge is gay did you know if you look at him you turn gay

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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