why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

What is the black stuff between elephants toes? Slow natives

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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