Please ignore this statement.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats worse than a worm in your apple? the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

thumb_up thumb_down -14

"what's fat,stupid,and has a shell" "i don't know what" "you, i lied about the shell"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops