How do you stop a black man from committing a crime? You throw him a basket ball.

You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

alert('The Game')

Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

My math homework brings all the asians to the yard and their like it wasent that hard and their like it wasent that hard. comment what song it is like.

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

A man walked into a bar. He left in a body bag.

Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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