How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

thumb_up thumb_down +9

an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops