Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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