If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

What do you call a white hankerchief dipped into the red sea? Wet.

Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

Once there was Girl whose Teeth were Crooked. She got Braces.

why dont you throw rocks at a mexican on a bike? its unethical and can severely hurt the individual on the bike

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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