I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

What is the black stuff between elephants toes? Slow natives

Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

Why did the chicken cross the road?

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...