what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

Dead girls can't say no.

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Nero, sure you are okay?

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

salad days!

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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