Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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Two reporters walk into Tah rir Square. Both are abused and that's sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gays house! knock knock who's there? The chicken!

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

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How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

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An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

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What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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