Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

Knock knock. Who's there? It's me. Oh, come on in. Thanks.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?  Getting raped by a 10 foot scorpion.

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

What are kids supposed to do in American classrooms if a nuke hits nearby? Hide under the desk. (This is a fact) Moral: Like that is gonna help... seriously that is ridiculous!

What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

woman's rights

teacher: say ur alphabet kid: abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwuxyz kid:wheres the pee teacher:half way down my leg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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