A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a white man sitting between two black men on a bus? A group of three people having a friendly conversation about the upcoming football season.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops