What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What's worse than taking a final? Getting shot in the face.

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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