What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

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If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

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what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

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What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

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roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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no rasist joks

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What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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Q:why was steve sad? A:he had an extra penis

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What's grey and can't climb trees? A parking lot.

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: my red painted d*ck

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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lets bomb africa

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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DEATH.

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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