knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

What do you call a white man sitting between two black men on a bus? A group of three people having a friendly conversation about the upcoming football season.

What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

Whats worse than suicide? death

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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