You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

There are two cows standing in a wide, green field eating hay. The first cow says: "Moo". The second cows says: "Thats funny, I was about to say that."

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Ever heard nobobys perfect well ill name my kid nobody therefore he will perfect

What does it mean if your tv appears floating away in the dark? You had an awesome tv.

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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